In my opinion, the word NO is the most feared word in our language. And what does that have to do with emotional eating, you ask? How often do you say yes when you want to say no? It happens so often for many people, they don’t seem to recognize it. Pay close attention. We are so afraid of telling people no that we tend to over commit and overextend ourselves. Then we get stressed and/or resentful because we really don’t have the time, energy, or desire to do whatever it is we said we would do. Where does that leave us? Right to emotional eating. Now you’re making the connection!! Why do we do this to ourselves? For one, we have weak boundaries. Boundaries are a good thing. It lets other people know what is ok and what isn’t. People actually appreciate boundaries because it clarifies expectations and it makes things easier in the long run. Anytime we make major changes in our lives, there is an adjustment period for the people around us, but eventually, it becomes the new norm. Just like children, the people around us need rules. Second, we feel the need to be perfect. So many women, particularly here in Utah, think they have to be everything to everyone. This is an impossible standard to set. You end up exhausted and burned out. Then what do you do? Eat. You emotionally eat because there is no other outlet when you get burned out. What it mostly boils down to is the belief that we aren’t good enough just as we are and we will be rejected if we don’t say yes to every request with a smile on our face. You can keep doing that if you want, but the stress and resentment will continue to build and you will likely continue to eat your feelings. If you are sick of that, start saying no where appropriate. Be honest with others (and yourself!) about your limitations. We are all human and we all have limits. Your desire to be a superhuman is only a set up for you. Instead, identify your boundaries ahead of time and communicate them directly without guilt. If you need help with the irrational guilt part, give us a call!emot
Michelle Lewis
Latest posts by Michelle Lewis (see all)
- Emotional Eating and Self-Care: What Have I Done For Me Lately? - September 13, 2023
- Are You Eating Your Anger? - August 9, 2023
- Stress Management: Everything You Know Is (probably) Wrong - March 7, 2023
Michelle Lewis has been working in the mental health field since 2001. She has a Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Weber State University and a Master’s degree in Social Work from the University of Utah. She is passionate about helping others achieve their goals.
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